Episode 114: Kerry Damiano

Kerry Damiano

Intro: [00:00:00] Welcome to the Pretty Powerful Podcast, where powerful women are interviewed every week to share real inspiring stories and incredible insight to help women or anyone break the barriers, be a part of innovation, shatter the glass ceiling, and dominate to the top of their sport, industry, or life's mission.

Join us as we celebrate exceptional women and step into our power. And now here's your host, Angela Gennari.

Angela Gennari: Hello. Welcome to. Welcome to another episode of the pretty powerful podcast. My name is Angela Gennari and today I am here with Kerry Damiano. Hi Kerry.

Kerry Damiano: Hi. How are you?

Angela Gennari: I am doing so good. So Kerry is the creator, writer, and host of her own web series and blog about travel style and shopping.

Ms. World traveler, Kerry Damiano has been to over 130 countries and all 50 states. [00:01:00] Her love of all things glamorous, which she weaves into every YouTube episode, stems from her decades long tie to the Padgett community. So that is very cool. So you spent a lot of time in the Padgett community. I love this.

Kerry Damiano: Yes. Over 40 years. I started in 1981. So back before most people were born.

Angela Gennari: Yeah, that's amazing. So you were the recipient of the legacy award for over 25 years of contribution to the pageant industry. Best pageant coach, best sponsor, brand ambassador. Best pageant judge and best forever title holder at the global beauty awards.

Wow. That is so incredible. So what made you want to get into that industry or that, that world, the pageant world? You

Kerry Damiano: know, I didn't, I never wanted to, well, when I was young, you know, I watched Miss America and Miss USA on TV, like everybody else back when it was on TV and thought that's not me. I mean, I [00:02:00] love it.

That's not me. And so I started sort of getting the, the inner spark, like you need to do this. You need to try this. And I resisted, but when I finally said, okay, okay, I'll do it. Then I got hooked. Yeah. You know, it's sort of the story road itself after that. But the first 20 years I did some competitions and I did some judging.

And then in the early two thousands, I started coaching and then I did a lot more judging and a lot of coaching, a lot of attending different pageants and co hosting and some different things. So really. Sunk my feet into it probably for the last 24

Angela Gennari: years. Okay. Very cool. So what is the average age of the, the contestants that you work with in the pageants?

Kerry Damiano: Uh, there isn't, oh, okay. There isn't an average age, because, you know, in the old days, again, it was sort of the 18 to 25. Well, now. Uh, we have pageants for babies up to 90 years old, [00:03:00] but I just judged the Ms. Senior World and their age categories are 50s, 60s, and 70s.

Angela Gennari: So

Kerry Damiano: there's sort of

Angela Gennari: something

Kerry Damiano: for everybody.

Angela Gennari: Absolutely. So I did pageants, full disclosure, when I was younger. So I started when I was probably 13 or 14, maybe, and I did it all the way through high school. So, uh, and then when Uh, it was, uh, I was part of the, it was the, the local Miss America pageant. Um, but also when I was younger, I don't remember all of those.

It was like the Miss York where I was from. Um, so they had some of the younger pageants. So I did that. Um, and then I did, what

Kerry Damiano: did you, what was your takeaway from that? I'm always interested to hear because everyone has a different experience. So what was your takeaway from it?

Angela Gennari: I think it made me comfortable with being, uh, in my own skin, you know, because you're really literally presenting yourself out there on stage.

I mean, so, um, [00:04:00] it gave me the confidence that I could go out and talk and I'm still, you know, I still struggle with public speaking sometimes. But I'm getting better at that. Uh, but it did give me a little confidence to be able to talk to people, uh, especially as a teenager, because you're talking to adults, you're being interviewed.

And so you have to have a certain level of poise. So that poise and that confidence is I've Kerryd that through.

Kerry Damiano: Yes. And that's what a lot of girls. You know, it's the whole reason that they enter and then that's what they get out of it. You know, when you do go into a job interview, you're like been there, done that, done the pageant interview.

So it almost seems like, yeah, I got this. It's just no big deal.

Angela Gennari: Right, right. Yeah, absolutely. So what do you feel is the biggest challenges? When people are coming into pageants, where do you feel like the biggest growth factor is?

Kerry Damiano: Oh, uh, biggest challenge and biggest growth factor, I think are two different.

They're different. So I would say the challenge is certainly when you're doing it in pageant [00:05:00] interviews, you know, we're taught in polite society, not to toot your own horn. It just kind of sounds boastful, right? But yet you're trying to be confident. And there's this very fine line between being You know, arrogant and being confident.

And so really learning what that is, be willing to talk about yourself and your accomplishments. You know, your, your idea in an interview is to let the judges get to know you and they can't get to know you unless you're willing to talk about yourself. Yep. Which is hard for a lot of us to do sort of, you know, very much along the lines of your podcast that we women, you know, we, we give our power away and we talk about other people and try and lift up other women, especially, but it's hard to do it for ourselves.

So I think that's something that you learn when you're in pageantry.

Angela Gennari: Um, I totally can res that resonates with me because, you know, like you were saying, we do talk about that on our podcast because women have a very hard time talking about their own accomplishments and their [00:06:00] own skills and their own abilities.

And I think that that hurts us not only in the pageant world, but it hurts us in the business world and getting promoted because we want to give, we want to give credit to everybody else. We don't want to take credit on our own because we don't want to. Come across as feeling arrogant, but men can get away with this all day long.

But women, you know, uh, we, we feel like it's just not polite. So we will hold that back and it holds us back as, you know, as women. So I can definitely understand that.

Kerry Damiano: Yes.

Angela Gennari: So where do you feel like people

Kerry Damiano: grow most? Uh, well, like you mentioned in your confidence, you know, I say this, not every pageant has a swimsuit competition, but a lot of them do.

And if you get into a swimsuit in high heels and go out on a stage where everyone else in the room is clothed, there's a big difference when you're out on the beach, everyone's in their swimsuit. But when you're the one. In a swimsuit, when everybody else is clothed, [00:07:00] that there's something about conquering that fear, that once you do, it's like, what, what's harder than that?

Right, right, right. So, so now you've got this confidence like, okay, if I did that, right, I can do this.

Both: Yep.

Kerry Damiano: So I think I just see women really coming into their own, into their power, uh, but into their confidence and saying, yeah, you know. I've done the hard things. Now, everything else just seems easy after that.

Angela Gennari: Do you feel like there has been a transformation of the type of women who are entering pageants now? Because, and the reason I ask this is because when I was younger, it was always the, you know, pretty popular cheerleader kind of, you know, mentality. But now I'm seeing like, I think Miss America or is it Miss America?

She's a fighter pilot. Like there, there's just, there's so much that, um, It's not the, the standard, what you think of as a pageant contestant. These are very [00:08:00] smart women who are very well rounded, who have a lot of skill sets, not just, you know, singing, dancing, you know, gymnastics, you know, what, what you normally see in a pageant, but you know, there, there's just an enormous, uh, variety, I would say of women who are entering now.

Kerry Damiano: Well, that's because it's become so much more competitive. Right. You know, in the old days, and when pageantry first started out, uh, it was about Beauty and, you know, uh, womanly arts in a way, but now it's, uh, it draws a different kind of woman because in a way you have to, you have to have it all right.

Beauty brains, um, ambition, uh, wanting to conquer the world. You have all of these things that get wrapped up that contribute to who we are as women. So, so there's also been a very. Um, significant trend toward authenticity and being who you are not trying to fit [00:09:00] yourself into a box of what the typical pageant girl used to be, but just being who you are.

And so you get a much broader variety of women and their skill sets and what they do, uh, and what they want to accomplish. The other thing that, uh, draws, uh, women in a different way is this voice. That you have a voice for the things that you're passionate about. There might be autism, it might be breast cancer awareness, whatever it is, you have as a title holder, a voice to talk about those things.

So again, you're, you're joining different kinds of women for different reasons.

Angela Gennari: Absolutely. So what, what do you say to those who are out there saying, it's just, you know, it's, it's objectifying women and it's sexualizing young girls and it's doing all these things. What is your response to that? Because I'm curious, because you do see a lot more women who are coming through the pageant circuit, much more well rounded, right?

Kerry Damiano: Well, that [00:10:00] is, um, that was true maybe in the fifties, sixties, seventies, it hasn't been true for a long, long time. So my answer would be to try it.

Both: Yeah. Because

Kerry Damiano: it's not that all, yeah. And so, and sometimes if you're on the outside, you don't know, just as with anything that you, once you get involved, you go, Oh, that's different than I thought it was going to be.

You can have a perception from the outside, but once you get on the inside, you learn and you said, okay, maybe I need to rethink my perception. So do it. Uh, you'll be. You know, you'll have a good time. You'll meet amazing, interesting, accomplished women of which you are one. So why not be involved in that sisterhood?

Angela Gennari: Well, and that's one of the things that I loved about being in a pageant is you have this like rooting for each other but yet it's still competitive and it teaches you that you can you can want other people to win and you can still want to Win yourself too. And so that is really important for people to [00:11:00] understand And I think that men do it all the time when you have like for example My son did wrestling when he was younger and I loved wrestling for him because it was one of those sports He had always played team sports sports, team sports were the only thing that he'd ever done.

And then he did wrestling and wrestling is different because you are on a team, but it's just you out there. And so you are out there and you win or lose based on you. And so, and so you can want the other people in your team to win, but also want to win yourself. And I think the pageants are very similar to that.

Kerry Damiano: Yes. Well, to say that, uh, you're not enemies, you're competitors, which is very different. So if you have that mindset that, you know, the person I'm competing against is my enemy, they can be my friend, uh, but we're just competitors. And I think that really helps you. And this was a long time ago. I was on a jury.

And the, um, prosecuting attorney and the defending attorney, you know, [00:12:00] court, they were just, you know, at loggerheads, you know, it seemed like, Oh my God, these people are just going at it. And afterwards I saw it was two women and saw them afterwards in the elevator talking and laughing together. Yeah. So that was a great example of in the courtroom, they were competitors.

They weren't enemies. Right,

Angela Gennari: right. And I think it's so important to know that, especially in business, when you're in business, there are so many people that, you know, for example, I'll sit around a room, you know, when we have a pre bid, so I own a security staffing company, and they'll do these bid meetings where, you know, big company or a big organization is going to release a request for proposal.

And everybody has to attend the meeting so that you know what you're going to be Uh, bidding on and I'll see all of my competitors sitting around the table and prior to the meeting, we're all sitting there hugging and laughing and shaking hands. And we're, we're great. But do I want to win that? You better believe it, you know, we're not going to share information about what we're bidding.

But also, [00:13:00] if I know that, you know, that went to you. Bob, I'm equally happy for Bob. I'm disappointed that I didn't win. But you know, we also have that that collaboration. And I think that that's so important for life. I think if you go through life feeling like everybody is out to get you or everybody is an enemy and business or, or anything that you're going to be miserable because I find the best collaboration is with people I'm competitive with because they can do it.

That's true. You know, we, we compete, but we're all trying, we're, we all have the same goal to elevate the standards, to lift each other up, prove the industry. And so if you think about it like that, we're on the same team, we're just different, you know, we're, we have different, you know, we all want to win.

We all want to be the quarterback that gets the ball across the line, but at the same time, you know, it is, it is also competitive. So,

Kerry Damiano: Oh, when you think that iron sharpens iron. Yes. And, and by being around other people who are excellent in their skills, in their industry, in whatever it is that they do, [00:14:00] you elevate to that level.

Right. And so, which is again, true in life as well as in pageantry and business, all kinds of things. So again, this was years ago. I was playing on a volleyball team at a school that did not have a volleyball team. So we started one and we got to play some very good schools and one of them was a, like a division four school that sent their freshman team.

And you know, these girls were all like six foot four and here we were just some high school players that had got almost like church league. I mean, it was that bad and, and we got stopped so bad. It was embarrassing. Uh, we played the best we'd ever played. And it was because they were so good. We elevated, not obviously to their level, but we played the best that we'd ever done.

I earned sharpens here.

Angela Gennari: That's right. Exactly. I always say, don't, don't try to be the best at what you do. Try to surround yourself with the best of what you do, because then you're in a different league. [00:15:00] Yeah. Yeah.

Both: Yeah.

Angela Gennari: So, so tell me a little bit more about, um, this world traveler, uh, cause you have traveled extensively.

So tell me about what you've learned in all of your travels.

Kerry Damiano: Sure. Sure. Well, let me first start by sort of how it came about. Obviously my 40 plus years in the pageant industry, that was sort of the impetus for the title Ms. World Traveler, which I had for several years before I started the business. I knew.

I was going to use it for something, but I wasn't sure. So when I finally sort of, you know, got the clarity, like the sky scales lifted off my eyes. I got the clarity of what it was. I realized that it was really a 40 year journey to get there because I started traveling. My first overseas trip was. As a college graduation present from my mom in 1984, and again, got hooked, uh, loved travel and started doing it a lot.

Most of it by myself. Uh, but [00:16:00] if you have to do it for a while, you can't really call yourself a master or an expert when you're first starting out, right? You have to have done it for a long enough time that people will recognize this person

Both: has done it long

Kerry Damiano: enough that they know what they're talking about.

Right, right, right. So as much as I would have liked to have done this many years ago before I had gray hair. Uh, this was the time. This is the right time in my life to do it. And I looked back and I had to get all of the pieces in place, the skills. The technology had to be in the right place. My finances had to be in the right place.

I mean, all kinds of different things. And I'm sorry about that phone. I turned off my cell phone and neglected to unplug the whole headphone. So I apologize.

Remember to do everything, right? But anyway, I'm thrilled to be doing this now at this point in my life because I feel ready to do it.

Angela Gennari: Yeah, good for you. Well, and I love to travel too. I didn't start [00:17:00] traveling until I was in college It's when I first took my first flight and I loved it First international trip was in college and I just continue to travel and I just love I love how it expands your mind I love how it opens you up to new experiences And you know, you see things on TV and you're like, oh, this is what?

Italy must look like, but when you go to Italy, it's not what it looks like, it's how it feels. And you do not get that from a television or from music,

Kerry Damiano: even a book, when you learn about it in school, history, isn't the same, no history is living. And so when you go there, you feel it, you experience it, which is totally different than reading about it.

Angela Gennari: Absolutely. So I love to travel and I've tried my best to expose my son to travel. So he had his first international trip at five months old, not that he remembers it, but I wanted that. For him, that comfort with [00:18:00] airlines, the comfort with traveling, the comfort with new places, the, you know, being in a new place and having to work through whatever the challenges are that come about, because I think that that's really character building and I think that challenges create opportunities for.

Kerry Damiano: Absolutely. I actually just returned from Asia and so many things went wrong that trip, including on my way over. I was supposed to just have a quick layover in Seoul before I headed to Cambodia and I got stuck there for three days. Oh, now. I had only packed for the tropics, humidity, heat, you know, so everything was lightweight and sleeveless and all of that.

So I know clothes for the snowstorm that I was stuck in, in Seoul for three days. So there's an accident, an example of the kinds of challenges you're going to go through and, and, you know, talk about character building. Are you going to get mad? Are you going to, you [00:19:00] know, uh, be angry with the poor people who are trying to help you slap their fault that there was a star and playing, you know, so it also forces you to think through scenarios and strategy.

Okay, what can I do? You know, how is this going to work? Do I do I stay at the airport to get a hotel? You know, all of these things that you're just constantly running scenarios in your head to figure out how to do it. And then once you do it. You get that confidence. Okay. I figured that one out

Angela Gennari: right now.

I'm ready for the

Kerry Damiano: next challenge,

Angela Gennari: right? Yeah. And it's amazing how much you grow in those moments and, and how much that adds value into your life that you don't appreciate in the moment because you're frustrated and you're angry at your, you know, this didn't go the way it was supposed to go, but you know, you, you don't realize the amount of value that that adds into your life.

It's too soon to appreciate it. So.

Kerry Damiano: Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Well, I think it helps you get through some of your fears.

Both: Yeah.

Kerry Damiano: Because I hear this a lot and, and maybe you do too, Angela. 'cause you love to travel. Yeah. But [00:20:00] women say, you know, aren't you afraid? Or is it safe? Or, you know, don't you get lonely doing it by yourself?

Or isn't it expensive to do so? I mean, they have all of these Yeah. Fears that they, you know, that they've got stuck in their head. But once you go through the challenge and you conquer it, and you're like, okay. That's one fear eliminated. I can figure it out. I do know what I'm doing.

Angela Gennari: Right? Yeah. I went to, uh, back in, it was my gosh, 15 years now.

Um, I decided to spend a month in South America. I was going through a divorce and I was just, you know, in my head of like, how do I want to pivot? What am I, what's the next chapter look like? I didn't think I'd ever be divorced. So here I am. You know, how do I, how do I manage through this and what does it look like afterwards?

And I just needed to get it. I needed to get out of my space because I feel like the worst place that you can, you can think is in your space because that's, you're stuck with the same thoughts running through your mind. And [00:21:00] so sometimes it just helps you to get out of the, the area that you're in. And so I spent a month in South America volunteering and I went to Bogota, Columbia for two weeks, and then I went to Cusco, Peru.

And it was the most amazing experience because number one, I was so busy. I couldn't focus on my own problems. And number two, because I was there volunteering, it really puts everything in perspective. Like I don't have it that bad. Right. And then you're driving through these areas and you're seeing, you know, the way people are living.

And you're like, I am. You know, I'm so grateful, you know, no matter what my life looks like, I'm so grateful for it. And so it just puts everything in perspective. It gives you a new appreciation for, for where you are and what you're doing and, and the things that you're going through and you, and it just makes you realize like, I will be fine.

I will get through this. And, but it also just gets you out of that space of, you know, the. [00:22:00] The same garbage going through your mind over and over and over again, you know, it gives you a break. The woe is me. Yeah. Yeah. Cause then you're like, you know, I don't have it that bad. It's all good. But, and I mean, not that these places were awful, they were actually very beautiful and the people were amazing.

And so I don't want to get the impression that, you know, that was, uh, that was not the problem. The problem was you realize how good you do have it and how, um, How, how people just genuinely want to be happy at the end of the day. And so in Bogota, everybody's like, Oh, you don't want to go there. It's a kidnapping capital of the world.

It's terrible. You know, you don't want to go there as a woman, you don't, you know, and, and, and it was just all the fear mongering and it was absolutely crazy. But at the end of it, like I felt safe. I felt respected. I never felt like I was, you know, being, uh, put in danger at all, but you also have to be street smart and the travel teaches you that you have to be smart.

You can't be oblivious to what's [00:23:00] around you. You know, there are certain things that you just don't do. Uh, you don't walk around with your iPhone out the whole time, like you would in America. And, you know, oblivious, um, you don't walk around with, you know, expensive jewelry hanging off of you. Like you just have to be streets.

smart, but at the end of the day, people are kind and they, they want to help you. So, yes, it was, I

Kerry Damiano: totally, totally concur with the, um, you come home with a newfound appreciation. Even for small things, uh, on this particular trip, I, you know, so many of the restrooms did not have toilet paper. Right. Well, I, I, you know, after the first one, I kept it just in case, but you know, just something we take for granted that most public restrooms, I mean, unless the role is out, but it's provided for you.

So it's a small thing, but it's a little thing. Okay. I was

Angela Gennari: in

Kerry Damiano: Cuba.

Angela Gennari: I was in Cuba in February [00:24:00] and you know, in our packing list, it said toilet paper and I'm like, well, that's just silly. Why would I bring toilet paper on a trip? But there's a reason. There's a reason because most of the places that you go, the public restrooms do not have toilet paper.

So you can get it at the hotel, but you know, it's minimal, but you need to take it with you because if you don't, there won't be any. Yeah. You're right. It's the things that you don't get used to our creature comfort. So, yeah, you would start walking around with toilet paper in your purse, but that's just, that's what had to happen.

And then like, you know, one of the other small things, you know, in Cuba, um, You know, if you wanted a late night snack, there's no grocery stores or convenience stores or gas stations that you just pop into and grab a candy bar and a bag of chips. That's not a thing like they, they don't do that. Uh, you know, when they're rationing food and, uh, you know, in a communist country, they, they're not, you don't, you don't just go pick up food when you want it.

It's not a thing that you can do. [00:25:00] So you start to appreciate some of the things that we have here and we take for granted, but at the same time, um, you realize how resilient people are. Yes. So the resilience, very, very true.

Kerry Damiano: And, and when they don't know anything else, they find the happiness in whatever it is exactly that they, that they have.

And so it's a good lesson for us, isn't it? Very good lesson. Uh, you know, sometimes you're so focused on what we don't have or, uh, you know, this is wrong with the government, or that's wrong with the, you know, whatever. Um, and then you see people so happy in their life that is so simple.

Angela Gennari: Yes. Uh, and so it's, it's

Kerry Damiano: a good lesson.

Angela Gennari: Absolutely is. So what advice would you give to your 18 year old self?

Kerry Damiano: Ooh, uh, Hmm. One be willing to wait. Okay. Because, uh, you know, when I was teen, I had this vision for my life and it was, I was going to get married at 24, be done having kids at 30, you know, and I'd have my family set and the whole thing.[00:26:00]

Well, that never happened for me. I never married and never had children. So 30 came and went and, you know, Yeah, yeah, yeah. So through that plan of the window, it was obviously never meant for me. Um, so be willing to wait, wait for the, for the good things that will come for you. And the other thing is, is to not necessarily live by The normal standard, you know, okay, you go to college, then you get a job, then you get married, then you, you know, and we have the sort of, these are the normal things to do.

If your, if your pattern is normal, then you're not a failure. There's nothing wrong with you. It's just, you have a different path and it's okay to just be who you are and, um, and embrace. What, what you're passionate about.

Both: I

Kerry Damiano: talk about that a lot because I think this thing women suffer from is they think I have to have a job.

Well, what if your interest is photography? Why can't you make a living doing [00:27:00] that? If you're passionate enough a bit and you work hard at it and you're dedicated to it, it will come, right? Not be successful on day one, nobody's successful on day one. We all have to work at it, um, to, you know, to get to. To a level that we're comfortable with, but the point is, is don't put that off.

You know, if you're passionate about something, start putting it into play today.

Angela Gennari: Yeah, I agree with you 100 percent because I see so many people who, you know, I, I am one of them. I had a set agenda for what my life was going to look like and when it didn't pan out that way, I really beat myself up. Like how could I have failed at this?

And it's not failure. You know, rejection is redirection, right? So you have to keep thinking of it that way of like, that was not my path. That might've been what. The path was that I thought, you know, this was supposed to be this way, but your path is sometimes different. You have to embrace that. Yes, [00:28:00] nothing wrong with that.

Nothing wrong with that at all. So what obstacles have you overcome throughout your journey in the pageant world. So tell me about a little bit more about some of the obstacles that you've had to overcome and some of the challenges that have made you gotten you where you are now.

Kerry Damiano: Um, that is a good question.

And I was kind of mulling that over and not a lot of things came to my mind of challenges. Most of the time. I'm the one who's in the way I get in my own way because of like we're just talking about having this. This is how it should be. Well, but if that's not how it is. I need to get out of the way and look at what the real, this is what's really happening.

And then how do I grow? How do I move forward? What new skills do I learn? All of that.

Both: But I've

Kerry Damiano: also always been a person who was overly confident, but enough. I didn't have confidence, even when I didn't know what I was doing, they say, make [00:29:00] it till you make it. Right. Um, I decided, uh, it was probably nearly 20 years ago that I was going to have my own TV show.

I'd never been on TV before, I didn't have any media training, I just decided I was going to have my own show and I did for a while. It didn't sell. So I would say there was a lot of people who would say it was not a success because it never sold. It was successful to me because I had a TV show, which I wrote and I, and it was on our local station and I loved the journey of that.

It was challenging. Uh, it was expensive. It was a growth opportunity. Um, it never sold. So, you know, it, it set me back financially, but I wouldn't have given up that experience. Um, You know, it's part of my past that I appreciate and I don't regret. So it was a growth opportunity and a checkoff. My bucket [00:30:00] list.

Angela Gennari: Well, good for you. And I think that sometimes that's perfectly okay. Uh, check off the bucket list and say, I did this, you know, this was something I wanted to do. I did it. Maybe it didn't go where I wanted it to, but you know, the experience is worth, it's worth it. So yeah,

Kerry Damiano: very nice. And it was part of, I think what prepared me for Ms.

World Traveler, because this is, it's like a TV show. It's on YouTube, but it's like a show. And a lot of the things that I learned. From doing the first one, I could apply to this, obviously different technology, um, much easier today than it was back then, you know, we had the big camera, you know, the guy and the phone, they had, you know, so it was different, but a lot of the skills, a lot of the challenges, you know, some of those things were the same.

And so, um, you know, as I started this one, I could look back on that experience. What did I learn? What did I do right? What did I do wrong? And take that with me into the new experience.

Angela Gennari: Yeah. Great lessons, great lessons in that. [00:31:00] So, you know, I, one of the questions that I always ask is as we, as women, we give away all of our power sometimes, you know, and we give credit.

And we were talking about this earlier in terms of like, you know, building our own confidence and, and how do we, how do we give, you know, how do we take our power back? Can you tell me about a time that you've given away your power and another time where you've maybe stepped into your power?

Kerry Damiano: Well, I was thinking about that question as well, and I couldn't find any specific things where I felt like I gave it away, uh, because I don't know that I ever did, but as a pageant coach, the whole idea of that is uplifting someone else.

That's the job, helping them, mentoring them, watching, helping them be successful. So I don't feel like that's giving your power away. It's using your power to enable someone else to almost not gain their power. Uh, and, and if we are confident. Well, in who we are, we have enough power [00:32:00] to share with everyone else, so we're not really giving it away.

We're sharing it, uh, and, and again, that whole iron sharpens iron, meaning you give it to someone else and yours goes back up. So, so you didn't lose anything. From doing that. And so that was, uh, you know, as I thought about that question, that sort of came to my mind that I shared my power. I didn't give it away

Angela Gennari: kind of like when you are, you know, you take a candle to light another candle.

It doesn't diminish the flame. That's right. Yeah, absolutely. So, uh, what do you wish more people knew

to,

Kerry Damiano: uh, to embrace the joy of life?

Angela Gennari: Yeah.

Kerry Damiano: With whatever it is, your passion, your dream, um, you know, the thing that you've always wanted to do. That's for me, that's part of what gives me my joy in life. I wake up in the morning excited about every day. Uh, just what is today going to bring? What am I going to [00:33:00] accomplish today?

Because I love what I do. If you love what you do, you don't, you don't work a day in your life or you've heard that said before. Right. Right. Um, so if, if, That's for me, that's embracing the joy in my life. And so it feeds upon itself. The more I do, the more I accomplish, the more joyful I become. And so, uh, you know, it just gives, it gives me a reason to wake up in the morning and to fall into bed at night, exhausted, but thrilled.

With what I accomplished.

Angela Gennari: So one question I have for you specifically, you know, as a pageant coach, what three things would you tell women are essential in terms of like having that confidence, you know, the kind of that pageant confidence that you would have on a stage, how would you advise someone who says, you know, I just don't feel like I can do it.

I just don't feel like I'm good enough. What, what three things would you say are the most important? Aspects of yourself that you could build up.

Kerry Damiano: Well, I don't know if these are going to [00:34:00] be the most important, but because I'm doing it, you know, off the top of my head. Sure. Um, the one thing, one of the first things is to never compare yourself.

To someone else, because comparison is like the thief of contentment it, uh, once you start looking at someone else, now you might suffer from envy or, you know, and in a way you put yourself down by wanting to be someone else to have what they have, what, whatever it is. If you can just look at someone else, say that's wonderful for you.

What I have is wonderful for me so, so that you don't have to compare, um, that's with life, right? I mean, that, that just helps you in life as well. Um, another thing is to be yourself. Don't try to be what you think other people want you to be because you don't know what they're thinking. We talk about a lot about this in judging.

Well, some of the judges won't like that. How do you know?

Both: Yeah. You know

Kerry Damiano: the judges? And if there are five of them, how are you going to hit all five? [00:35:00] Because one person liked what you wore and another person hated what you wore. So you can't go by what you think somebody else wants because you don't know what they're thinking.

It's impossible to know. So that means just be yourself. And that way, if you don't get the job, if you don't win the crown, whatever it is, you won't have to say, well, gosh, if I had just been myself. They might've liked me better. You'll never know. But if you just were yourself, you can say, okay, I wasn't the right person this time for that job, for that title, for whatever it is.

You can be confident in, um, that I just, I stayed true to who I am and I want to be the best that I can be. And that's going to be my third thing is be willing to be the best that you can be because there's always something to learn. There's always a way to grow. And so when you say, well, I'm going to be me.

So that means I'm going to sit like this. Yeah. Yeah. No, you have, you have to learn some skills. You have to, you [00:36:00] have to learn to be the best self. And that's where the growth, it's where the confidence, that's where gaining life skills comes from. Those are my three things off the top of my head.

Angela Gennari: I love it.

I love it. Yes, absolutely. And I think just having that ability to be yourself. because when you're constantly trying to be someone else, and I think a lot of young women deal with this because we're constantly dealing with imposter syndrome. You know, I, I talk to audiences and most of the audiences that I talk to when I do speaking engagements are young women.

And when I ask them, what is the thing that you fear? And it's imposter syndrome. It's imposter syndrome is what they're dealing with. And so they walk in trying to be. someone else or they try to be what they think the person wants them to be. And that's your biggest mistake. Your biggest mistake is trying to change who you are to accommodate somebody else, because it's never going to be, you're never going to feel confident in your own skin if you do that.

And The most attractive part [00:37:00] of a woman is confidence. And so a smile, confidence, head back, you know, not feeling like you're walking in with your head sagging. Like you don't belong there. Walk in like you own the damn room. Absolutely. If you think you do, they will too. Right? That's right. A hundred percent.

I walk into every room. Like I'm supposed to be there, whether I know it or not.

Love it. Yes. Well, I have really enjoyed our conversation. This has been so wonderful. So, uh, how can people find you?

Kerry Damiano: Well, we'd love it if people followed us on our journey. Okay, so it's, uh, YouTube, ms. World Traveler, Ms. Ms. World Traveler. Okay, we're also on Instagram and that's Kerry Ms. World Traveler.

Kerry is K-E-N-R-Y, Uhhuh . There are 17 spellings, so don't assume you know which one. Oh gosh. Ke Ms. World Traveler. We're also on Facebook, uh, Ms. World Traveler, uh, and website, ms. World traveler.com.

Angela Gennari: Beautiful. Well, thank you [00:38:00] so much, Ms. Kerry Damiano. I want to say that right Damiano. Thank you so much. It's been such a pleasure talking with you and I just wish you so much luck out there and I appreciate what you're doing.

To, uh, to increase the confidence of, of women all around the world. So thank you for that. You too. Thank you. All right. Well, we look forward to seeing you on another episode of the Pretty Powerful Podcast. And if you want to find Kerry, you can also go to our website at prettypowerfulpodcast. com. And we look forward to talking to you next time.

Have a great day, everybody. Bye bye.

Intro: Thank you for joining our guests on the Pretty Powerful Podcast. And we hope you've gained new insight and learned from exceptional women. Remember to subscribe or check out this and all episodes on prettypowerfulpodcast. com. Visit us next time, and until then, step into your own power.